I cannot believe this happened ! me and my Girlfriend are going crazy about this! My condom broke like a month ago when we were having sex and i didnt relize and now she is pregnant, we are going to college next year and cannot support a baby at all, i feel terrible for doing this but we are kids ourselves, Please if your only here to critize then dont say anything, i need help not people to judge me, i need to know approx. how much a abortion costs, and if you could tell me how much it costs in New Jersey, how long do we have to wait to get an abortion, or how long do we have for one, we had no intention of having a baby, we alwayss used protection, and OUR parents cannot find out about this, Could i get a secret abortion or somthing like that we are both 18 now, Please we need help not anyone to criticize us, we have our whole lives ahead of us, and we are no where near ready for a child, please help me and give me all the advice you can, this is a very serious matter, and ill rate the best answer with whatever points you want, i could care less about points right now...
11 Answers
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I'm going to be completely honest with you... if you knew you were not capable of raising a child and you knew that pregnancy can happen from having sex... then you KNEW this could happen. Now because of your poor choices you are going to end the life of an innocent child? Why not give it up for adoption? Oh, can't do that because then your parents might find out. So what, your parents not knowing is more important then your child? Really?
This isn't criticism, this is reality, you had sex knowing the possibilities and chose to do it anyway.
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Info if you need it . . . .
If you go to a Planned Parenthood clinic that has a low-income program it can be as cheap as 100$. If you tells them you have no job, no money and no support (ie no boyfriend or husband) they will likely have you pay the minimum for the procedure and get donations to cover the rest. 1-800-230-PLAN (1-800-230-7526) to find the Planned Parenthood clinic nearest you. If you are underage it will mostly likely be free and it's always confidential.
You have the choice between the pill (which can be taken up to 9 - 11weeks, at home or at a friends house) or the vacuum method (in clinic procedure). Personally I used the pill method so I could be at home with my husband but some women want to have the surgical, so it's done and over with when they leave the clinic.
You will be financially screened - usually this goes on the honor system, weight/height taken, blood pressure checked, pricked -fingertip- to check for rH factor and anemia, you will receive an ultrasound or sonogram to determine gestational age. You may be asked if you want to view the image, this is up to you. You will receive antibiotics, anti-nausea tabs and pain meds. Take them ALL. You must finish at the very least your course of antibiotics. Follow all aftercare instructions and go back to your after care appt. This last step is vital, you must go back for your aftercare appt! Abortion begins a new menstrual cycle. You should have a regular period in 4 to 8 weeks.you should have the option of receiving birth control - again this will most likely be free, take it and use it correctly.
If you are underage you may want to check this site out to see about parental consent laws and whatnot. http://www.sexetc.org/state *Even if it says you need parental consent, you don't. Call PP and tell them you cannot tell your parents; by law, a judicial bypass must be available to those minors who just cannot get their parents/guardians permission. A judge signs the parental consent acting as a de facto guardian. Abortion funding http://www.nnaf.org/help.html
Some state medicaid program do pay for it, use this link and figure out if your state covers it. If they do, you can go to "welfare" office and get emergency coverage and the state and taxes will help pay for it. http://www.ourbodiesourselves.org/book/companion.a...
It is entirely possible to have an abortion and not feel guilt because you knew it was the right thing to do. Other women's stories about their abortions and their choice to not regret it. ImNotSorry.net
If you have any more questions or want/need to talk about it drop me an email.
~Pro-Choice Momma; Have had an abortion <no regrets> and I have a 17 month old daughter <no regrets>. I believe in protecting my daughter's choice.
Abortion: There is a Consensus
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The price of abortion, in New Jersey and elsewhere, is a lifetime of regret and guilt. Here are 1000 stories to that effect.
http://www.silentnomoreawareness.org/testimonies/i...
When the woman is pressured into abortion while her heart tells her otherwise, it is even much worse. I heard live testimonies about this, by 10 women or so who belonged to an organization called Silent No More. They all choked uncontrollably into tears during their testimonies, although all of them had their abortions a decade or more earlier. If you don't want that future for your girlfriend, don't pressure her. And even if she is willing now, more likely than not, she will come to regret it bitterly. You too may realize that there is somebody very important missing in your life. The above website has a section on fathers of aborted children, which deserves a visit.
There are organizations to help, especially Birthright, which would have a centre close to where you live:
At 18, you won't die if your parents know. If they are normal people, more often than not, after the initial shock, they come to love their grandchild, and even get excited about it. As for the future, you can look at another website to see the brighter side of it. Girls much younger than that keep the baby and go ahead in their studies and life anyway:
So, just be there for your girlfriend and your baby. Be a father. Being a father is the happiest thing in my life. It can be the same for you.
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Abortion Clinics In Nj
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abortion price jersey cost
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One of my closest friends lives in northern New Jersey and had an abortion there a few years ago, at a private clinic in Hackensack. It was a medication abortion (abortion by pill), and it cost her $375.
Abortions can generally be performed until a woman is 24 weeks pregnant. Medication abortions can be performed up to 63 days — 9 weeks — after the first day of a woman's last period. Women who need an abortion and are more than 9 weeks pregnant can have an in-clinic abortion. There is more than one kind of in-clinic abortion procedure. The most common is called aspiration. Aspiration is usually used up to 16 weeks after a woman’s last period. D&E — dilation and evacuation — is another kind of in-clinic abortion. D&E is usually performed later than 16 weeks after a woman's last period.
To read more about the different abortion methods, visit the Planned Parenthood website, here:
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/abo...
Abortions typically cost anywhere from $350-$1,000 in the first trimester, depending on where you live and where you choose to have the abortion done. If you don't have the money to pay for the abortion, then my best advice is to go to your local Planned Parenthood clinic and explain your situation. The people at Planned Parenthood can definitely help you. Planned Parenthood offers low-cost abortions to women who cannot afford to pay the normal price of an abortion. If you and your girlfriend go to your local Planned Parenthood health care center and just tell them that you have no job, no money, no support, and cannot afford to pay for an abortion, they will make you fill out some paperwork about your current financial status and then just make you pay about $100 for the abortion or whatever you can reasonably afford, based on your financial status. (Since you're both so young, they may even be able to arrange for your girlfriend to have the abortion for free.) To find the Planned Parenthood nearest you, just go to the Planned Parenthood website and type in your zipcode (on the front page):
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/
Since you're both 18, you don't have to tell your parents about the abortion; legally, you and your girlfriend are both adults, and therefore you don't have to tell your parents about the procedure at all. Everything that happens at the abortion clinic will be kept completely confidential, so don't worry. Legally, the doctors that perform the abortion cannot inform either of your parents about anything that happens there, due to doctor-patient confidentiality laws. So don't worry about that.
It sounds like you and your girlfriend are doing the responsible thing by having an abortion instead of having a baby that you don't want and can't afford. Don't listen to the ignorant, obnoxious pro-life zealots on here that are telling you things like, "Don't let your girlfriend get an abortion, she'll never forgive herself, she'll regret it every single day for the rest of her life!" because that's just a bunch of nonsense. In reality, most women feel RELIEF after having an abortion -- NOT regret. Serious, long-term emotional problems after abortion are about as uncommon as they are after giving birth. They are more likely to happen for certain reasons — for instance, if a woman has a history of serious emotional problems before the abortion, if she doesn't have supportive people in her life, or if she has to terminate a wanted pregnancy because her health or the health of her fetus is in danger. Ultimately, most women feel relief after an elective abortion.
I hope that helped. Best of luck to you and your girlfriend.
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I am sorry I have no answers for you but I feel the need to tell "somebody" my opinion as she felt free to share her opinion.
"somebody" would you rather they both ruin their lifes by not getting an education and bringing this baby into thus world. They are also people that made a mistake. Would you rather they get minimum paying jobs for the rest of their lives since they have no college education or better yet end up on welfare? Adoption- are you willing to pay their medical bills for them and provide their needs until the child is born? Will you deal with the consequences if both families? I always find it amazing how people can just judge other people. Tell me about your life and I am sure I can point so many mistakes you are making. That's your opinion , please keep it to yourself. You are not God hence you can not judge them.
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I'm not hear to criticize you, but at 18 - you should know that condoms don't prevent sex 100%.
You should have gotten Plan B after the condom broke if you didn't want a baby. Better yet, you shouldn't of had sex at all if you didn't want one.
That being said, try Planned Parenthood.
They should be able to tell you how much it may cost, and places that do it.
At 18, you don't have to tell your parents anything. You're adults.
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The majority of people discover that there are constantly barriers in their course and that luck does not favor them at crucial turning points.
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Good doesn't exist honey, sorry you found out so late