Why is it that some girls are “tighter” than others? And why am I always tight?

Yes, I'm referring to sex, and this is a truly honest question. I'm 18 and I've had 3 partners in my life. My first partner was average to small in size, then my next two were sort of on the huge side. But then when I went back to my first partner he said I was as tight as before we'd broken up so "I must of not had sex with anyone" then was complaining abt another girl being so "loose". I'm baffled because I think I have the same amount of sex anyone else my age does (about once a week, and like 3 or 4 rounds each time) and every time he goes in I literally feel like I'm being "stretched" I'm always relaxed and lubricated and it hurts but never burns, and after a few strokes it feels great but very very "full" so why is it that I'm always tight and guys complain about other girls being loose?

P.S. One of the "bigger" guys also complained about a girl having "no walls"

8 Answers

  • the whole Tight/Loose is a Myth-- here are the Facts:

    Being "tight" is a good thing. WRONG! Absolutely, completely, 100% wrong. In fact, that particular myth is exactly opposite of the truth. When a woman is aroused sufficiently, her vagina actually loosens and her cervix pulls up to allow for comfortable penetration. That is just the way that sexual arousal works for women, thank goodness. So you should be looser when attempting vaginal penetration, not tighter. In fact, feeling "tight" is usually a pretty good indication that a woman is either not ready for penetration or simply does not want to be involved in penetration (or sex, period) at that point.

    Being "loose" means you've had lots of sex/had sex recently/etc. Again, absolutely false. Being relaxed and well lubricated means that you're into whatever sexual activity is going on. It is important with this as well to understand that the vagina is a muscular tube. This means that the vagina will conform to whatever is inside it. So when there is nothing in a woman's vagina, it is closed in on itself (in other words, the walls will be touching). Essentially, it goes back to exactly the way it was prior to penetration. Immediately after sex, the vagina may remain relaxed for several minutes, but it will return to its prior state very shortly. Certainly, like any muscle, there are variations in muscle tone, but for most women, especially younger women, there's just no reason to worry about a lack of tone with the vagina and the surrounding muscles, and having had sex doesn't decrease tone: in fact, that'd be a pretty backwards thing to think about the use of any muscle, since use increases tone of the muscles. You could have intercourse everyday for a year and it still wouldn't change a thing. Similarly, you could abstain for a year and it wouldn't change a thing either (assuming that when you do have sex again, you are aroused and relaxed).

    Penetration permanently changes the "tightness" of the vagina. Strike three! Penetration does not cause any permanent changes in the vagina. As I said before, the vagina is a muscular tube, so it stretches to accommodate and then returns to its previous state. Even vaginal childbirth results in very few changes to the vagina. In that case, the changes to the internal configuration are extremely minimal. Some change may be noticed in the vaginal opening if serious tearing occurs or if an episiotomy is done, but again this is generally fairly minimal. So if the passage of a baby does not permanently alter the vagina, it's not even logical that intercourse would cause changes. I haven't heard of a penis that's the size of a full term baby, have you?

    So in short, worrying about being "tight" is a pretty pointless and actually counter-productive thing to do. Having sex will not make you looser. Not having sex will not make you tighter. There's not anything that is going to make you permanently "tighter" that is healthy or a good idea. And if you are feeling tight, that's a good sign that you don't want to be having sex right then anyway. If you want to do something like Kegel exercises, that's fine. Rather than making you inherently tighter during sexual arousal, it will probably give you more conscious control over those muscles that you can exercise during sex if you desire. But really, you should focus on being relaxed and enjoying yourself, rather than being as tight as a partner may (incorrectly) believe you should be.

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    Why is it that some girls are "tighter" than others? And why am I always tight?

    Yes, I'm referring to sex, and this is a truly honest question. I'm 18 and I've had 3 partners in my life. My first partner was average to small in size, then my next two were sort of on the huge side. But then when I went back to my first partner he said I was as tight as before...

  • Hey! I have the same issue!

    I'm 18 and my first boyfriend was on the small side and sex with him was pretty average, my other sexual partner was quite big and it really hurt every time. We were together for a year but sex got so painful I couldn't ever cope with doing it for too long and our relationship just fell completely. I've met someone new but sometimes I'm so tight he can't even get inside and sometimes it hurts him :S Every guy I've been with has instantly thought i was a virgin, though I've told them I'm not. I'm always worried about being too tight, but i do enjoy sex a lot. I read somewhere that masturbating is meant to help and lots of foreplay, but I think some people are just naturally this way :S

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    It depends on your pelvic spread (how wide your hips are) and also if you enjoy sex or not. It's natural for the vaginal walls to clamp and make a "tight glove", and the more you're enjoying yourself the more likely you are to clamp down with your own muscles. Also, a woman's vagina isn't a batcave! It should tighten and return to "closed" during regular, non sexual time periods.

  • after a few days of none use a woman goes back to her normal shape , always changing, if you incert a pencil into yourslf you can adjust to feel it too,no pressure but it will adjust to accomidate and if you introduce a larger object it will adjust to accomadate this too after a male 6 inch circumfirence penis you can feel the same alone with a single finger, women are mysterious creaters adaptable of many things

  • well the more you have sex the "looser" you are you get more loose the older you get also. you can actually do excersises that make you tighter. some girls are more loose than others because they may use "objects" or whatnot. really it just depends on the girl. everyone is different.

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  • Girls become tight by wearing high heels or walking a lot. But it's usually hereditary. The girls that were 'loose' may of had lots of partners.

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